Rodeo Position

Two guys in a bar are discussing "positions" so one tells the other, "Well my favorite is the rodeo!"

and the other says, "What's the rodeo?"

"well, first you get your wife down and start to do her doggy style, then when you're halfway done, you bend over and whisper in her ear, 'you know, this is your sister's favorite position too' and then try to hold on for 8 seconds!"

stuck!

yo mamma's so fat that when she jumped up in the air she got stuck!

Knitting Blonde

A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway. As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting.

The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs. "No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"

Missappropriated Churchill Quote

A man walks out of a bar totally hammered, only to be greeted by a snobby woman.

She takes one look at him.

"You, sir, are drunk!"

"And you ma'am, are ugly. But when I wake up, I will be sober!"

Men Are Like

..Placemats.They only show up when there's food on the table.

..Mascara.They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

..Bike helmets.They're good in emergencies but usually just look silly.

..Government bonds.They take so long to mature.

..Copiers.You need them in reproduction but that's about it.

..Lava lamps.Fun to look at it but not all that bright.  read more »
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